You Are Not My Competition

Scrolling through my Instagram feed I spot a photo of a friend. Pregnant, blonde, and fabulously dressed (in heels) with a perfectly smiling children lined up to perfection. She has perfect hair, perfect nails, perfectly tanned skin and perfectly smiling babies. Cue the inner thoughts. “Whelp, she looks better than I do and she is pregnant with four kids!” and “Wow, I need to step up my game.” My instinctive reaction is feelings of inadequacy and competition.


Fast forward to the next day. Thoughts of pregnant blondie creep into my mind and I actually get myself ready and go to Target. Walking through the checkout line a mom in the isle across from me is quickly trying to pay while her toddler throws a fit. The woman behind her lifts her eyebrows, and rolls her eyes giving the young frantic mommy “the look”. My heart sinks as I realize that in my fully imperfect human skin I have been on both sides of this situation.


Why do we do this to ourselves? Why do we do this to each other? I don’t want to be your competition. I want to be your cheerleader.


Whether you are in heels or yoga pants.

Whether your hair is blown out to perfection or in a three-day old top knot.

Whether your toddler has perfect manners or is throwing a tantrum in the middle of Target.

Whether you choose to vaccinate or choose not to.

Whether you breast feed or you use formula.

Whether you gave birth in a bathtub with no meds or had a scheduled C-section.

Whether you use Tylenol or essential oils.

Whether you wear your baby or push a stroller.

Whether you choose homeschooling or public school.


Lets stick together. We are different. But, friends, we are the same. We are daughters of the most high King, and we are mommies to those little souls.


So next time I see your little one throwing a fit in the middle of the dang grocery store, I will give you a high five and tell you that you are doing a good job. When I see that perfectly dressed pregnant mama in heels, I will compliment her how great she looks. When I see you pulling out your formula container to get a bottle ready, I will smile knowing that you are lovingly and diligently providing for that baby. I wont roll my eyes. I wont compete. I won’t judge you.

You are doing an excellent work. You are a good mom. You are not my competition.